![]() However, the spouse that had the affair needs to be willing to discuss what happened openly if the betrayed spouse wants to do that. ![]() The breakdown of communication and intimacy in a relationship lies with both partners, therefore, it is important to engage in personal examination of individual roles to best understand an affair. Examining personal roles in an affair is a delicate dance as it is often hard for the partner cheated on to see his or her role in the affair. More commonly, it’s a search for an emotional connection - wanting someone to pay attention to you, be attracted to you, or compliment you.Īlthough, personal examination may seem impossible to do following an affair, both partners must examine the role each played in the affair. Sometimes it is purely a case of poor judgment - a person may feel satisfied with their marriage, but a late night at the office with a co-worker and a couple of glasses of wine can lead to lack of impulse control. ![]() There are many different reasons why someone might have an affair, reasons that may not be readily available to both the partner that has the affair and the partner that was cheated on. Understandably, once an affair is discovered partners struggle with understanding why the affair occurred, the signs they missed, what they should have done differently, etc. Learning how to appropriately communicate thoughts and feelings is an essential first step in getting beyond the pain of an affair. Partners that are stuck in their pain and animus following betrayal in their relationship often experience a breakdown of the relationship. Whatever the reason for the affair, the effect of infidelity can be devastating on a relationship. Unfortunately, for many couples, the weight of an affair can prove too big to overcome.
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